I went and paid for Opera recently. I've bought the previous two versions but I've resisted paying for version seven. Then I went looking to see if they had any updates available and I noticd that they had a special where you could register Opera for one operating system and then get a reg code for another OS for ten bucks. Since I have Linux and Windows floating about the house, I thought it was a pretty good deal and so I paid up.

When I got my registration email, another email came along with it. It was a gift certificate that I could "send to a friend" for a free registration of Opera. Uhhh... how come I couldn't just use it to get the WIndows version for free? I don't know, but it was mildly annoying. Ten bucks ain't too much to spend anyway, I guess. I use the software all day every day.

Since I don't know any friends who use Opera, I didn't know what to do with the free registration and it seemed a shame to waste it. So I decided to submit it to Fark, saying that the best joke gets a free registration for Opera. (I can hear you asking "What, pray tell, did your B.S. fark submission link to?" My answer is obvious: the world's largest rodent.) I got a bunch of responses (over 30, actually) but the best one was this:

Tony Blair is at his weekly meeting with The Queen, when he turns round and says: "As I'm the PM, I'm thinking of changing how the Country is referred to, and I'm thinking that it should be a Kingdom". To which the Queen replies, "I'm sorry Mr Blair, but to be a Kingdom, you have to have a King in charge - and you're not a King."

Tony Blair thought a while and then said: "How about a Principality then?", To which the Queen replied "Sorry again, but to be a Principality, you have to be a Prince - and you're not a Prince, Mr Blair".

Again, Blair thought long and hard and came up with "How about an Empire then?" The Queen, getting a little pissed off by now replied "Sorry again, Mr Blair, but to be an Empire you must have an Emperor in charge - and you are not an Emperor."

Before Tony Blair could utter another word, The Queen said: "I think we're doing quite nicely as a Country".

Subtle and dry. It took me about 30 seconds to get it, and then I laughed my ass off. I thought the various Anglophilic types in the family might also enjoy that one and so awarded the author with a free registration.

An honorable mention was the following:

How do you know when it's bed time at Michael Jackson's house?

When the big hand touches the little hand.

That Jackson weirdo is comedy gold, I tell you...